A few thoughts for a Sunday evening….

Today was a great day: the AT had a great idea for a date day to the big city today and it was so refreshing to just have a day to feel like a normal couple. Not people who are living everyday wondering why and the hell we aren’t afforded the same luxury as others regarding parenthood. We were just ‘us’ for the first time in a good long while. For that I am incredibly thankful.

Last night I think I had my first major meltdown regarding the reality of IVF and how terrified I am. My depression/anxiety is at an all time high and I question if I will be able to recover if IVF doesn’t work the first time. I’m not sure where we are supposed to have all this money hiding and ready to come out whenever we need a random $15,000  to have an opportunity to have a child. The reality that this is just a chance (and not a guarantee) at having a family is honestly terrifying. I woke up today wondering how I would be able to look at the AT if (when) the IVF doesn’t work. How am I supposed to live every day questioning all of these things?

Just a few thoughts….hope y’all have a great week!

By the way, what was that Walking Dead?!?!

Tape it up y’all, The AT’s Wife

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My list of no-no phrases!

A few things I wish I could put on a poster and hand out to everyone I meet.

I think that everyone dealing with infertility issues has their own running list of stupid crap not to say to them and here is mine.

1. “When are y’all going to have kids?”
I am completely guilty of asking this question to friends almost as soon as the ink of their relationship was dry. I know (having been this dumbass) that the intention behind this question isn’t to insult although it brings about quite a bit of pain.
So, unless you are someone’s OB/GYN you have no business asking this question.

2. “Why don’t you want to hold the baby?”
I have been asked this one on multiple occasions and being a school teacher I can usually get out of it by saying that I’m covered in school germs and wouldn’t want to pass them on to your new baby. Try your best to understand that my heart is literally broken in about a million pieces every time I see a baby that I can’t have and holding yours will pretty much send me on a tailspin. So, lets avoid this with all possibility!

3. “You just need to relax and let it happen”
Ummm, not so much. The precious teacher next door (who has literally been teaching longer than I have been alive) tells me every time I have a fertility appointment that I should save my money and go on a cruise. Again, just shut the heck up and leave my ass alone.

4. “Why can’t you be happy for me?”
I personally haven’t had an issue with this one directly, but have had some indirect issue with this. As part of our ‘coaching family’ get togethers we make meals for our hubby’s to eat after various events as everything is closed by the time they can leave. We have had many new additions to our little coaching crew and some of the newbies mommies think I am a royal jerk because I am not the first to volunteer to hold the baby, change the baby, or take meals to their homes. I’ll admit it that I am completely selfish about his one. Self preservation is the name of the game, not making sure people like me. I gave up on that one a long time ago.

5. “Just adopt, there are so many kids in this world that need a good home”
Let me educate you about a few things regarding this statement. First, adopting isn’t for everyone. The AT and I have discussed this at length and the idea of becoming attached and then loosing the child after 30 days because the birth mother has changed her mind is literally too much for us. Also, we also know that not everyone is meant for adoption, it is a child not just an alternative. It’s not right for us. One more interesting tidbit….contrary to popular belief adoption is incredibly expensive in most cases. In a way this is a financial decision as much as it is an emotional choice.

 

Thanks for reading this incredibly long post, I promise I broke it down by quite a bit and will add to this list later.

Have a great week y’all and feel free to add to your own in the comments below!

Tape it up, The AT’s Wife

Dinner is Up Y’all

I love more than anything to make a delish dinner for the AT (my hubs) and myself. This weekend I made some part whole wheat french bread rolls to go with AT’s favorite meatloaf supper and had about a dozen left over. Now, I think that all carb loving people can agree that nothing is better than fresh bread with a TON of butter is one of the best meals on the planet, but may not be the best for me on a daily basis. Which is why we should limit carb only meals to once a week, I know, I have some serious restraint.

Sunday I made an obscenely large pot of sausage and chicken gumbo and had some down time while the roux was turning a lovely caramel color and decided to get a head start on my cooking/prep for my dinners during the week.

I first chopped up a few veggies for multiple meals which will save me quite a bit of time during the week. I label some plastic baggies with what is inside and the recipe each is for and throw it in the crisper drawer.
Now, on to the fun part….multiple meal starters for about 15 minutes of hands on work!!! Best news ever, or at least of the day.
This meatball recipes yields about 36-40 meatballs and between the 2 of us this makes for about 4 meals. I leave out the ones we will use this week and then put about 10 in a freezer plastic bag, label them and they get put on the freezer inventory list and thrown in the deep freeze located in our garage.

With the remaining rolls, I split them down the middle and buttered them up with a little garlic salt and shredded mozzarella. Throw them in a 400• oven for about 7-10 minutes until it’s warm and the cheese is melted. Seriously delish!

Meatballs to myself and the AT are a regular occurrence in our dinner plans. Other than the traditional spaghetti and meatballs we also use them in meatloaf subs (on homemade french bread, of course) and even in a tomato based lasagna soup. I am always looking for more uses of these delectable bites, that means please share if you can think of anything else to do with these yummies!

Enjoy! Let me know how this works for you or if any questions come up.

Tape it up, AT’s wife

Ingredients:

2 pounds ground beef (Turkey is also a great alternative)
1 cup dry breadcrumbs (plain is best, so you can control the salt level)
1/2 teaspoon salt
1 teaspoon pepper
1/2 cup milk
1/2 cup beef or chicken broth
2 large eggs
2 tablespoons dried parsley
1 tsp Italian herb mix
1 cup shredded mozzarella
1/4 teaspoon red pepper flakes (totally optional)
2-4 cloves minced garlic

1. Mix all ingredients together except the meat and let it hang out for about 10-15 minutes. Preheat your oven to 350
2. Gently mix in the ground meat until the seasonings are mixed completely through.
3. Using a small ice cream scoop, measure out your meatballs and place on a foil lined cookie sheet. My little scoop is about 2.5 tablespoons.
4. After measuring out the little meat blobs, take each blob and roll it around in your hands to create ball shapes.
5. Bake at 350 for 35-40 minutes or until they have reached an internal temperature of 165

Recipe source: adapted from Mel’s Kitchen Cafe (http://www.melskitchencafe.com/2010/04/italian-meatball-subs.html)

Here Goes Nothing

Hello Blog World,

I am honestly not sure where this is going, but I think it will go somewhere!

A little bit about me:

1. I live in a tiny town that is approximately the size of my huge high school and absolutely love/hate it. Feelings depend on the day and what I want to accomplish in a day.

2. Most, if not all, people in town identify me as, “The Athletic Trainer’s Wife,” hence the blogs name.

3. I have 2 of the most precious rescue puppies who make my world go around.

4. As of this moment, I think my sister and I may be the only ones reading this blog. (Hi sister!)

5. My precious niece is a carbon copy of my sister and that makes me love her even more.

5. I love to cook more than anything else in the world, cleaning up my mess makes me want to cook less.

6. I teach middle school English and an loving it!

7. More than anything in this world I want to be a mother (Long story, will share later)

8. I wish that I was more budget conscious but if it goes on sale, I literally must have it.

So, thanks for reading sister (and anyone else)

Let’s see where this thing goes…recipe post at some point this week.

Tape it up, AT’s Wife